Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Life as I know it

There are a couple things that I know about life. There are a bunch of things I DON'T know about life.

Some of the things that I DO know are these:
1) People love to be loved. No one can deny it. When someone loves us unconditionally, is excited to see us, does something special for us we feel like the top of the world.
2) Its hard to leave relationships (see #1).

I'm confronted this week with the opportunity to interview in two different cities for two very different jobs. In San Diego I have the opportunity to interview for a job that I think I'll be good at, and goes with what I want to do for a career (it moves my current ministry into a career) but its with a whole new group of people. In Greenville I have the opportunity to interview for a job that I will be good at, but that I will have to "make" into something I love - and I'll work a lot of extra hours doing it, but the people are ones I know and love. In San Diego I am a long car drive away from my family and a cheap flight away from a ton of my friends and family. In Greenville I am not a cheap flight nor short drive from any of those people - but I'm near a bunch of people who are dear friends to me, and there are women here who I would like to see graduate from College, or go further in spiritual matters.

The Lord promises that if we leave our mother/father/sister/brother that he will replace them 100-fold (Mark 10:29-31). And thats been true all the time I've been away from my family and friends. The Lord has been more than faithful to his promises. But lately I've been wondering if I'm "wasting" the time I could have with my grandparents or parents. If something were to happen to my grandparents, my mom or dad, my brother, would I believe I've made the right decision to stay in Greenville when I had a chance to move closer?

Today the point remains moot. I don't have a job offer yet anywhere. The residence life job at Greenville didn't come through and so I'm left with two options that as of yet are not options (ok, and I'll apply for another couple jobs tomorrow) but may be.

In meantime, speaking of feeling loved. I do.

Many reasons (and these are 3 CURRENT reasons!):
~ Weekend in San Antonio with John/Karen/Ryan/Andi/Jared (see pics above!) and Karen's Parents Nick and Dorothy. I feel as loved by this family as I do by my own family. I feel "a part" of it as though we are related - and we are. The kids welcome me in as though I haven't been away and then say things like, "Tiff, don't go." - how can that not make you feel loved? They support me so often with kind emails and phone calls, and they find ways to bless me in ways that are secret desires of my heart.
~ My parents are the greatest parents in the world (argue if you must, but just because you don't believe it doesn't mean it isn't true.... :) ). They are generous and thoughtful, fun and adventurous. They love each other and have taught me how to love and how to hang in. They love me with more love than I can imagine; supporting me with words, touch and occasionally money - even when they didn't understand my decisions. They always stand by me.
~ God is eagerly desirous of a relationship with me. He craves for me to come to him and rest. He calls to me and calls me "Beautiful Daughter" and he enables me to embark on exciting adventures that are great mysteries - he knows that I love mysteries. He offers me rest and comfort and affection, challenges me to be better and exemplify his nature more. He knows me intimately and meets me as who I am, in the fullness of my personality - which at its very BEST (ok, thats not every day or even 100% of any day but go with me) is a part of God's personality. I was created in his image.

Among all the women in the world today and despite all the mental gymnastics I am going through regarding my future, I feel the most blessed. You can argue - and I hope you do! - that YOU are the most blessed (because somehow in God's economy You are and I am, too!), but we would have a great time recounting the ways that God is blessing each of us and in the end come up with the fact that God is good. All the time. Despite our visible circumstances - and in fact because of our visible circumstances.

Among all women, he chooses me.


He chooses you, too.

Consider it.

Love, Tiff

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